To the Mother of One Who Wonders if She Can Handle More

Today Jonathan and the Mac and cheese doodles had a chance to go to Six Flags St. Louis courtesy of neighbors with season’s passes. That has left just me and the snickerdoodle to hang out all day. I realized very quickly into the day that I have never had a 2 year old all to myself. By the time the mackerdoodle was 2 we had the cheese doodle and by the time the cheesedoodle was 2 we had the snickerdoodle and their year of two was largely overshadowed by the chaos of another round of newborn/infant stage. A two year old all by herself is hilarious. And exhausting.

As I was typing that last paragraph she was peppering me with “why” questions about everything, interspersed with her newest favorite word, “everybody” (or “ehbody” in snicker speak.). As she did so, she leaned back against the grill of the van, then hopped up, glaring at the offending vehicle. “Ow! Dat hot!” She said, and proceeded to run around the perimeter of the van touching random locations and saying, “Hot” followed by giggles.

We are outside to play, but every time she goes down the slide, or jumps, or picks anything up, or has a random thought about either related or unrelated things, I have to respond. I’m all she’s got. She has only known life with the built in entertainment system “siblings 2.0″. Without it she’s lost. The frequently asked question of the day is : “Why ehbody doe away?”

Until today I had no answer when people would ask me if three was harder than two or one. I really had no frame of reference. Today I would say this:

Of course the chaos multiplies a little with each child, so does the laundry, the noise and to some extent the general chores of the house, but the minute to minute intensity of parenting is divided. Three children collectively demand less of my individual attention than does one.

If you are a mother of one scared of having another because you can barely handle the demands of the one you have, I say only that the joy is multiplied and the intensity divided as a family grows. I thought I would get more done with only one child at home. Instead I am accomplishing less.

Mothers of only children, today you have my admiration. You must be exhausted.

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About Coralie

After 11 years of infertility, I am now a mother to three, a wife of a Presbyterian (ARP) preacher and a struggling homemaker. Welcome to my little corner of the net. Kick off your shoes, put your feet up and join the conversation. View all posts by Coralie

3 responses to “To the Mother of One Who Wonders if She Can Handle More

  • Melissa

    Very, very true. At least until some nebulous number that I can never really pin point. But I have seen on the faces of some moms with many children that at some point, one less was much easier than whatever she has now.

  • bobbistowellbrown

    My daughter was extremely strong willed so I didn’t want to have another child because she was so difficult. But my husband talked me into having a second child. I prayed that the Lord would give me one like Christopher Robin in Winnie the Pooh. He did! My daughter was 6 and she was going to move to the attic if we had a boy. When we did have a boy I told her that it would be a good idea to make friends with him because some day he would be bigger than her. She did make friends and even though they have opposite personalities they love and support each other. They are both walking with the Lord which is the biggest blessing of all.

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