May 29, 2012

The Other Shoe

By Coralie

Does anyone else do this? I was just about ready to head to bed tonight when the mackerdoodle awoke throwing up. There’s a stomach virus going around the neighborhood and it looks as if she caught a wee strain. I got her cleaned up, her bed cleaned up, and fresh sheets and jammies in place, and now she’s fast asleep again.

But I can’t go to sleep.

I’m tired. I’d love to curl up in my bed and let my eyes fall shut, but my brain is telling me: “It’s never this easy. Either she’s going to throw up again, or another doodle will join the fray. You’re in for a long night, so why even bother?” It’s irrational, and even sinful inasmuch as I am borrowing trouble that may never come. Here I sit. Yawning. Blinking the long blinks. Waiting for the other shoe to drop.

The thing is: if I go to bed tonight I could sleep all night, but I will certainly sleep until the much anticipated shoe drops. I may be tired, but I’m guaranteed to be less tired than if I stay up all night waiting for the vomit that may never come. Isn’t this exactly the point Jesus was making when he told us not to be anxious? Worrying can’t add a single hour to my life, but it can make a lot of the already written hours of my life completely miserable.

Ok self. I hear you. I’m off to bed. Each day has enough shoes of its own. Why wait for one that may never drop?

Leave a comment   |  tags: , , , , , , | posted in Mackerdoodle, parenting

May 29, 2012

Lipton and Honey Winner.

By Coralie

Is that weird? I feel like it is.

So Megan is the winner of the giveaway, which is pretty cool because I win stuff from her blog Half Pint House Handouts all the time.

Congratulations, and thank you all for entering.

1 comment   |  tags: | posted in Thoughts and Musings

May 28, 2012

Not Exactly the Shores of Tripoli

By Coralie

Jonathan finished his last exam in the middle of May, and then, in an event unprecedented since the birth of our Cheesedoodle, almost three years ago, he had three consecutive days off work that weren’t devoted to things like moving, or having a baby. On the fourth day, as he was getting ready to go to work, he said “These past three days keep making me think of the Marines slogan: ‘the hardest job you’ll ever love.’ I mean, you spend all day working at the same things and they keep needing to be done and when you go to sleep you know that they will just have to be done again in the morning. The Marines can at least shoot at or blow up their hard job.”

It was sort of affirming to have my husband, who is working full time AND doing seminary full time, compare MY job to the Marines; but it isn’t exactly accurate. Our conversation turned very quickly to women who did my job, and didn’t have the option of asking daddy to take the kids outside so she can mop the floor. Single mothers have to do all of the endless tasks every day AND they are on call 24/7. They don’t have back up. A few nights later some other mothers and I got discussing military wives who are essentially single parents during deployments and the challenges that must bring.

I hope we blessed mothers who are able to stay at home and raise our kids with supportive, loving husbands under whose leadership we can rest and grow, take more time to thank the Lord for the blessings of our job than we do complaining about the daily grind of it. This may be a tough job without a lot of affirmation or task completion, but it could be a lot harder and for a lot of women it is.  The calling of homemaker is a God honoring high calling; but we need to keep it and ourselves in perspective. We’re not exactly storming the beaches ladies, and we need to remember that.

 

EDITED TO ADD:

Just found out that the “Hardest Job you’ll ever love” slogan is for the peace corp, who do not storm beaches, shoot at or blow up anything and had nothing to do with the shores of Tripoli. Oooops. If you can look past that, I stand by the rest of the post.

2 comments   |  tags: , , , , , | posted in Thoughts and Musings

May 25, 2012

Lipton Tea and Honey – A Review and Giveaway

By Coralie

Time for a confession: I drink generic powdered diet synthetic iced tea with lemon. You know the kind; strange brown powder folded into a foil packet designed to be emptied into a water bottle. Yeah. The kind that makes my husband shudder.

When Lipton offered to send me some samples of their new Tea and Honey drink packets, I figured I’d just add a few packets in my regular stash and my husband would shake his head as I mixed it up. When it arrived, however, there were some pretty significant differences from my usually drink choices. It contained no aspartame and no artificial coloring of any kind. As is always the case with these things, I mixed it with 20 oz. of water instead of the recommended 16 and took a swig. It was different enough from what I usually drink for me to recommend that Jonathan take a sip of mine and his reaction was to mix his own glass for lunch.

Let me be clear. This isn’t natural. If you’re running carrots and spinach through your Vitamix (and I know who you are!) then you’re not going to like this any more than the other powdered drinks in my cupboard. But if you’re looking for an aspartame free, zero sodium, low calorie drink you can carry with you, this is a good choice. You can find the full nutritional information by clicking the picture which will take you to the Lipton website.

If you’d like to try it, I have four to-go packets I will send to one of you.

THIS GIVEAWAY IS NOW CLOSED

Here’s how you can enter:

  1. Leave a comment on this post for an entry
  2. Click the “like on facebook” button on the sidebar (and leave an additional comment to say you did) for a 2nd entry
  3. Tweet this: “I entered to win Lipton Tea&Honey from @coraliecowan http://bit.ly/KqXElF” and leave a link to the tweet in an additional comment.

The giveaway will be open until midnight on Monday and I’ll announce the winner Tuesday.

 

I was given a free product to sample because I’m a Klout influencer. I am under no obligation to receive the sample or talk about the company. I get no additional benefits for talking about the product. I keep a disclosure statement here.

10 comments   |  tags: , , , , | posted in compensated posts

May 24, 2012

Living a Translucent Life

By Coralie

Today at lunch I was discussing a blog with Jonathan that both he and I read. In that discussing I said that I wanted to be more transparent in my blogging than this particular blogger. Jonathan’s response surprised me. He said that he didn’t want me to be transparent. He wants me to be translucent.

There are two problems with being transparent.

First, a transparent object allows light to pass directly through it. It doesn’t reflect or diffuse light in any way. We, on the other hand, aren’t supposed to let attention pass through us, we are supposed to be always directing people – diffusing their attention, if you’ll let me strain this metaphor a little more – to the glory of our Heavenly Father.  Secondly, a transparent object allows anything contained within it to be clearly seen. This isn’t how God intends us to live our lives. We shouldn’t broadcast the secret parts of ourselves in the name of “being real.” There is no mutual edification in allowing our plumbing – both literally and figuratively – to be displayed for all to see. Transparency is a life that allows attention to pass through it, focusing on its actions. The end result is either celebration of or repulsion from the life in question, both of which serve as a distraction away from the ultimate goal of glorifying GOD and enjoying HIM forever.

Instead, Jonathan challenged me to be translucent. Enough light should pass through this blog to show you the day to day movement of our life and our comings and goings, but in the end it should always be filtered through grace and diffused back to the glory of the Lord. It’s not just the blog that we want to live this way. We want this to define our life now, and the future ministry to which the Lord will call us after seminary. We want to live translucently.

Leave a comment   |  tags: , , , , | posted in Thoughts and Musings

May 14, 2012

What Would You Tell Yourself If You Could Travel Back In Time? (Apart from “Buy Amazon Stock”)

By Coralie

I have been asking myself this question lately, as I look around my life at things I am still struggling with and wishing I had learned some of these lessons earlier.  I think it’s because being in seminary at almost 40 is a little like getting into a time machine. There are some of my neighbors that I look at and think, “Wow! I wasn’t that wise that young,” and I wonder how they got that way. I used to think, “who gave them counsel that shaped them in this way?” until I realized quite recently that even listening to wise counsel is a sign of wisdom and maturity. Only the wise seek wisdom, or heed counsel.

That was a shocker, because I know what I said when I was in my early 20′s and someone tried to address a sin issue in my life. I said, “Bite me.” I immediately went on the defensive, most often by engaging in ad hominem argumentation (ie: “I might be lazy, but your kids are rude.”) I justified my sin, I gossiped, I let bitterness take root and flourish instead of cultivating grace. I didn’t read Proverbs because I was far more like folly than wisdom and that just made me mad.

In short: if you knew me in my 20′s I’m sorry for everything I ever said to you and did around you and thought about you.

In answer to my title question, the sad conclusion that I reached is this: If I could go back in time and speak to myself at 24 or 26 or 28, I don’t think I would have even heeded myself. That’s why I’ve learned so many lessons the hard way, and late in life – because the Lord had to give me ears to hear before I could begin to learn. I’m still far too deaf and foolish for an almost 40 year old.

So what about you? If you could talk to yourself ten or fifteen years in your past, what would you say, and do you think you’d listen to yourself?

2 comments   |  tags: , , , , | posted in Thoughts and Musings

May 11, 2012

So, Is This How Some of You Live?

By Coralie

For the first time in my adult life I am not being defined by my reproductive system. I am not pregnant. I am not breastfeeding. I am not actively trying to conceive. I don’t really know how to handle myself.

Since 1997 my life has been dominated by counting. For eleven years I counted cycle days, praying on the way up that the numbers wouldn’t come back to 1, and often crying when they did. Then I counted gestational weeks, at first praying they would keep climbing toward 40 (and crying when one didn’t) and then praying they would just end. In between I counted hours until the next feeding, hours of sleep, growth in days, then weeks, then months. Always counting, but not any more.

In some ways my identity has shifted from my reproductive system to the products of it. Between potty training, speech and physical therapy, cooking, cleaning, laundry and general troubleshooting/fire stomping, I’ve got my hands full enough that I’m glad I’m not counting too.

But today I looked at a calendar to determine the date of a future event, and realized that all days were essentially equal. In that realization, I suddenly wondered, “Oh. Is this how other people live their lives?” I may be calling on some of you for tools in navigating this new approach to life.

Leave a comment   |  tags: , , , , , , | posted in Miscarriage and Infertility, pregnancy

May 3, 2012

Book Review: A Woman’s Wisdom by Lydia Brownback

By Coralie

I am so excited I was able to review this book before it was released last week. A Woman’s Wisdom: How the Book of Proverbs Speaks to Everything is an excellent women’s devotional or bible study tool. Available from Crossway Press in ebook (11.99) or paperback (14.99) this book may be mistaken for an easy read. Style wise it certainly is clearly written and easily understood, but the content is far from easy. In fact, I am writing this review – because I think all of you should rush right out and buy the book – but I am still working my way through it myself. As I read through q portion I have to stop, ponder on the truth presented, repent, praise the Lord, and then read on. It’s taking a little more time than the average “Chicken Soup for a Chicken’s Soul” book.

She starts, as should all books of this sort, by laying a clear foundation of the gospel, and clearly laying out the truth upon which all studies of wisdom must be built: the fear of the LORD is the beginning of wisdom. In the Preface, she says, “The point of [Proverbs] is to direct us to the Giver of wisdom. . . .Wisdom is a Person, and wise is what we become through our union with him. The outworkings of wisdom – it’s fruit – discussed in the following chapters  are all rooted in this truth.” With such a root, this book is a firm tree of biblical direction.

The book itself is laid out in a very clear manner. Part One is “What is Wisdom and Why Does It Matter” a fairly detailed comparison of wisdom and folly as found in Proverbs 1-3 and 8-9. Part Two is “Six Things Wise Women Know” dealing with her words, her friendships, her physical appetites, her emotions and her money and her sexuality. Finally, in Part Three, “A Portrait of Wisdom” Brownback takes a detailed look at the Proverbs 31 woman who has terrified and/or enraged women for millennia.

I am bogged down in Part Two, because as Lydia Brownback lays out the wisdom of scripture in these areas, and then contrasts them with what the Lord says is folly, I am having to stop and repent of my own folly. As soon as I do, I find her pointing me to Christ as the only one who can bring me out of folly and into wisdom. This is a fantastically gospel centered book that contains quotes from John Calvin, and the Larger Catechism. I think you should all go buy it (I may have already said that). I am going to recommend it to our women’s ministry team as a bible study for next year and you may want to do that as well.

Just to sell it a little harder, here are some of my favorite quotes:

“Wisdom is indeed clear, but it’s clarity doesn’t come in a three-easy-steps sort of way.The more we soak ourselves in God’s word, the more we will be able to readily lay hold of the wisdom we need for particular circumstances.” (p 25)

“As wisdom increases, anxiety decreases. . . Wise women know that God is trustworthy and that he can and will handle all these matters for our good and his glory. . .Wisdom isn’t so much something that God gives to us, as something he does for us . . .” (p 39)

“The world tells us to glory in our particular strengths, in what makes us measure up to or surpass the accomplishments of others. The Bible, on the other hand, tells us to rejoice that we have been made in the image of our Creator.” (p. 62)

” . . . only in the last generation has multitasking come to be considered more virtuous than moments of silence and reflective thought. “(p 65)

“If we do not cling to Christ as our anchor, we are going to look for security somewhere – everywhere – else, most usually through our relationships.” (p 80)

“Pop culture calls this “codependency.” The Bible calls it “idolatry.” Either way, God didn’t design friendship as a means for self gratification.” (p 81)

I think that gives you a snapshot into some of the reasons I am so pleased to recommend A Woman’s Wisdom, by Lydia Brownback.

2 comments   |  tags: , , | posted in Book Reviews

May 1, 2012

How the Transience of Seminary Has Caused Me to Appreciate Two Friends Even More

By Coralie

So it is that time of year again, in which my neighbors graduate, pack their belongings into large trucks of innumerable brands, and move on. This year I will lose Suzanne and Mary Beth and that idea just puts a little sad seed in my heart. They’ve known me for two years. Mary Beth was the first seminary person to find me and friend me on facebook, Suzanne and her family were the first members of this remarkable neighborhood to strike up a “passing” conversation that ended up being 20 minutes long. Mary Beth and I are in a small group at church together. Her oldest daughter LOVES my kids and the feeling is mutual. Suzanne and I have had conversations about everything from crocheting to organic farming to the implications of the regulative principle. I will deeply miss both of them.

On Saturday I was introduced to a new family who will be moving in to our neighborhood. He is doing summer Greek. They have three children close in age to my children. They seem like really nice people. On Saturday, I thought “I don’t have the energy to get to know you and just say goodbye in two years.” I was kind, and I chatted and I asked questions, but I put a fence on my heart with a one way latch on my side. I just don’t have the heart to keep doing this.

Then I went inside and the Lord spoke to me using facebook.

Really.

Something I ALWAYS do when I get on facebook is check which pictures Jawan has uploaded. Saturday I was not disappointed. There were some pictures from our Georgia church (where Jawan’s husband, Mitch, is our Georgia pastor) and I only recognized about 1/3 of the faces. You see, our town is a military town, and our church attracts military families. Families come to Westminster for a season, rarely for a lifetime, and Mitch and Jawan love on every one of them. I have never once seen Mitch or Jawan place a guard on their heart when meeting a new person. I have, repeatedly, seen them weep as now cherished families move on to a new geography. On our first Sunday at Westminster, the congregation said goodbye to a family who had been deep and heart felt friends for several years. That same Sunday, they made our little family of three feel welcomed like we were the first visitors in years.

Mary Beth and Suzanne loved on me here, knowing that we would only be neighbors for two years, but they also knew that this sort of annual upheaval was a short season in their lives. Mitch and Jawan have taken the ebb and flow of their unique church as their life time calling. If they can do that, I can welcome our new neighbors this summer. And if we get new neighbors in December, I can welcome them. I can take the fences down and love them well, for whatever time I have, because that is what the gospel at work in Mitch and Jawan have taught me.

3 comments   |  tags: , , , , , | posted in Family and Friends, seminary life

April 30, 2012

Some Thoughts on Missions and the Body of Christ

By Coralie

Our St. Louis church just finished our annual missions conference, and Jonathan and I attended as many of the activities as the school/work schedule would permit. I always find missions conferences to be exciting. Hearing what the Lord is doing around the globe reminds me (first) of the utmost and primary import of sharing the good news of the gospel and (secondly) that the bride of Christ, of which I am a small part, is so much bigger than my tiny life experience.

Growing up, my family was very missions minded. My parents personally  supported missionaries not only financially, but by praying for them by name during our family devotional time, hosting them often in our home and being active participants in various missions events and activities, both within our home church and elsewhere. Some of my vivid childhood memories are of mission events. I remember wearing a burkha in our pastor’s living room, while Rod and Donna Black talked about ministering to Muslims in northern Pakistan. I remember slide shows – not PowerPoint – actual square slides that sat in round discs on the top of a whirring, hot projector. The slides shone on a portable white screen that my father stored in our basement, which screeched in protest when it was dragged from its metal casement to reflect back images from Art and Carol Clark of the steep, green, misty mountains of Irian Jaya and the startlingly exotic Yali people group. I remember sitting, spell bound, as Doug Anderson told tales of foreign mission experiences to the native people so close I didn’t even see them.

The importance of being exposed to missionaries as a child, and by extension a tiny fragment of their mission field, cannot be over stated and now that I am a parent it is so important to me that I do the same for my children. I was so delighted to see my mackerdoodle absorb the facts and images from Malawi, Ecuador, Nicaragua and South Africa that were paraded in front of her this week, and to hear her questions as she processed the implications of what she was learning. It is one of the many reasons I praise the Lord for guiding us to our St. Louis church home. The missions conference is a yearly opportunity to discuss missions, not as an abstract theory, but attached to the faces of real people. It is an opportunity for me to learn alongside my children about how God is living and active around the world.

We do it with our children, but we do it FOR ourselves. So often we can fall into the trap of believing that all of Christian history has looked as weak, bland and ineffectual as the current scope of Western Christendom. When I begin to believe the lie that the gates of Hell have clothed themselves in the robe of apathy and assaulted the entire Church, I need to see the gospel at work in the life of a foreign mission field. When I am briefly convinced that the church universal has, does, and will look like my neighborhood congregation, I need to see the gospel at work in the life of a foreign mission field. When I am tempted to make major life decisions based on comfort, perceived security and social pressure, I need to see the gospel at work in the life of a foreign mission field.

I can’t encourage you more to become actively involved in the life of a missionary and to seek out a missions conference. You will not regret it.

Leave a comment   |  tags: , , , , | posted in parenting, Thoughts and Musings

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